Tired of sucking? Want to rid the barriers holding you back from becoming a football star? Then jump right in to this hilariously funny guide to becoming high school's Golden Boy, college's icon, and professional football's headliner in no time. Fly through this wondrous ride as you learn how to pull the chicks and control the nerds. Don't put this guide down and walk away from unimaginable riches. You and I both know you have the potential. Your future is waiting. Oh by the way, you're welcome. Prologue If the title alone wasn't capable of helping you comprehend that this book is about football, then you might as well do us all a favor and just kind of squeeze this book back into that tiny space on the bookshelf so someone a little brighter than the average nimrod can be blessed with my knowledge. Now if you picked this up and it took you quite some time to recognize that climbing the ladder is a reference to starting at the bottom of the football food chain, and being guided by...

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