This book carries a 100% GUARANTEED RETURN POLICY. What I mean is, I GUARANTEE if you RETURN this book, we will revise our customer service POLICY. Speaking of our customer service policy, if you are not completely satisfied with this book for any reason, you can mail a picture of you NOT READING this book -- plus a copy of your receipt and maybe a handwritten note explaining why you think this is the worst boating book ever -- to Slip None, Whittaker Creek, Oriental, North Carolina. There is no one at that address, but sometimes it helps to vent. Speaking of venting...if you own a boat, you know what I'm talking about. If you DO NOT own a boat, what are you waiting for, a sign? Okay, here's one sign: Salt water covers over 71% of the eartha??s surface. That means if you had a boat, you could be, at this very minute, wet. You might also be broke, permanently deformed from living in spaces the size of a Tupperware bread box, have a dent in your skull from banging your forehead into...

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